Cancer 2.0

Your cancer has metastasized to the liver.  A bold statement of deliverance from the ER Doctor.   Is my heart still beating?  I can’t breathe, the Doctor’s voice is a dull murmur in the back.  The emergency room is not as chaotic as it seemed as while I was waiting for the CT scan results.  I’ve been here before, however this time its different. Ironic that the Doctor who has announced this news to me is Dr. Rose, but all I feel is the thorns.  I feel pain and simultaneously I feel nothing, a numbness has taken over my body.

I brought myself to the ER thinking acid build up or gas?  How could I be so off?  I usually have good intuition.  I am by myself this time.  My Husband is at work, thinking the same thing, probably acid or gas.  I try to get myself together and try to call the best person who can handle this news and deliver it to the right people.  I call my Brother in law, hoping he can contact my husband so I don’t have too.

My sister, brother-in-law and husband come to take me home.  This is when they tell me everything will be alright.

Be brave they tell me.  Me, who am I ?  I, the Bald.  Who are they? The Beautiful.   The Beautiful surround me, the people who give me the strength to believe, give me the strength to keep moving forward. The Brave are my fellow cancer peeps that are going through treatment or been brave to endure the treatments but moved on.  I dedicate this Blog to those of my friends that were Bald, Brave and Beautiful that have passed on from Cancer.

 

12 thoughts on “Cancer 2.0

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    1. Neelam, you are a force – without even knowing the impact you have on the world around you is so amazing! I’m so proud to know you and love you – I look forward to reading and connecting through your words! Keep it up!!! Xoxo

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  1. Hi Neelam
    I remember working with u at the sears indoor duct caller place when you were in high school I think…. You have always been a beautiful person inside and out. Sounds like through this difficuly journey you have continued on as that same beautiful person you are despite the hardships. Your strength is an inspiration. Thank you for sharing

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  2. You are amazing Neelam. I still remember how Sonia felt when she reached out to you, a sense of comfort and someone that knew exactly how she was feeling my prayers are with you sunshine ☀️ 😘🌈🙏 had hope for her all the way through

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  3. Neelam I think are very brave in opening up your thoughts and feelings and sharing this journey with us all. Only a truly amazing person can do this.
    I look forward to reading more.
    Keep smiling.
    X
    I feel blessed to have spent time talking with you on our visit to Vancouver last year.

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  4. Neelam, you are the strongest person I know. You give us hope and hopefully shame the ones that think they have problems. You are an inspiration and a pillar of strength. I admire and am humbled by you. I am blessed to call you my friend and sister.

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  5. My dear friend, you are an inspiration to me and everyone you will touch in your life! I love that you are sharing your journey and encouring others. Words cannot express the gratitude I have in being your friend! I love you ❤️

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